tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-89897002012-01-16T10:24:58.187-05:00Once upon a time, there was a bean...Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.comBlogger2411100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-52107649054050778102011-09-26T11:53:00.000-04:002011-09-26T11:53:23.912-04:00

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Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-56798410701789037352011-09-15T11:22:00.001-04:002011-09-15T11:23:44.418-04:00

This song is my kryptonite.  T and I listen to lots of music when we're playing, and sometimes I'll put on the Pandora kid's music station so that we hear a variety of tunes. They play a version of this song that hits my heart in ways many things don't these days. (Triplets born to a girl I went to high school with, who was featured in the paper and is mentioned at our church every Sunday? 

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-854698933615289832011-08-18T09:32:00.002-04:002011-08-18T09:36:51.393-04:00

When Tuesday rolled around, let me tell you—I was feeling pumped UP! Ready to rock ‘n roll with the new regime of FertileAid, healthier eating and better fitness.  I ran 5K, lifted weights at the gym, walked Tate about a mile to the park where we played airplane (me flying him around like a plane for 10 minutes or so), climbed and played on the swings and slides, walked back, and then did some

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-26692905667079962032011-08-15T10:10:00.000-04:002011-08-15T10:10:28.093-04:00

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Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-71539826790995984382011-08-08T14:23:00.001-04:002011-08-08T14:23:45.886-04:00

That's the sound of the other shoe dropping. The sound of the book closing on this chapter in our lives. The sound of my heart plummeting from (let’s be honest, it was never on the penthouse floor—but maybe 5 or 6?) to the basement level. The sound of the cash register door jerking open to reveal no more rainy day funds.  Our beta today: 0. Those were the last of our frozen embryos. I’m

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-36888241358025303502011-08-06T14:54:00.000-04:002011-08-06T14:54:52.583-04:00

Thanks for the responses to my last post, you all!  I didn't realize anyone checked this space anymore. Which I guess says something about my willingness to talk to myself...the stuff I jot down here is mostly what goes through my head when I'm lying awake at night, and while it feels good to get it out, I sometimes forget that people are actually listening. So thanks for being so supportive~it

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-21131783230897071232011-08-05T08:55:00.000-04:002011-08-05T08:55:03.634-04:00

After lauding yourself for your willpower to resist testing yesterday, did you run right out and purchase a HPT?  Yes. Did you pee on a stick this morning?  Yes. Was it the starkest of stark white negatives?  Yes. Are you now despondent? Yes Even though it was probably too early to test?  Yes. Are you now re-evaluating every potential pregnancy symptom you were feeling as proof that your period

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-14595124063999722862011-08-04T13:50:00.001-04:002011-08-04T13:50:52.656-04:00

Tingly boobs?  Check. Cramping?  Some. Occasional heartburn/nausea?  Yes. Not as much now as a few days ago. Trying not to read too much into that. Appetite?  Quite ravenous. Desire to pee on a stick?  Very very strong. Willpower to prevent myself from doing so?  Still present!  We'll see if I can make it past the weekend. . . . My actual pregnancy test is on Monday.  I'm taking it as a sign

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-56297854729048575572011-07-28T09:58:00.001-04:002011-07-28T10:02:03.725-04:00

Tomorrow is our frozen embryo transfer (FET) and I feel (finally, thankfully) great about it!  As ready as I have felt since...well, since we had Tatum.  I feel well-rested, healthy, and balanced. I've been eating fruit and veggies by the cartload, it seems, and running or exercising frequently. Getting plenty of sleep at night. Avoiding caffeine and alcohol. Taking the many meds involved in this

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-12004691854388327192011-07-18T11:53:00.002-04:002011-07-18T11:56:21.170-04:00

Apparently what it takes to get me ready for attempting another pregnancy is two 11-hour plane rides and several days in a foreign city with my husband. Ahhhhhh.  Bruce and I were in Prague last week (well, he’s still there on business—I’m back home with the amazing Tate!).  And it was FANTASTIC.  I’d almost forgotten the sensation of wandering around in another country, exploring to our hearts

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-76109380638737461902011-06-21T11:28:00.001-04:002011-06-21T11:32:24.822-04:00

We had to push back our second scheduled FET date (originally planned for June 20) for a variety of reasons. Travel, work, finances--things just weren't adding up to June being a good month to possibly make a baby. Unfortunately now, I'm suffering a crisis of confidence. I'm not sure if it's all the waiting or having just turned 36 last week or what...but I'm struggling to remain optimistic that

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-626593375886541222011-05-06T13:29:00.001-04:002011-05-06T13:30:02.974-04:00

... another Frozen Embryo Transfer!  Wooo hooooo!  Come on, isn't that at the top of every "entering the second half of her thirties" woman's wish list?  ;) It would be SO much more fun to be heading into the officially no-longer-in-my-early-thirties territory already pregnant. But the transfer in April didn't take, as you all know from my last post. Funny how these things NEVER go as planned.

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-84790711100301857382011-04-21T11:16:00.003-04:002011-04-21T12:50:34.953-04:00

I've been catching up with some of my favorite blog writers this week. I often turn toward blogs in the infertility/IVF/adoption/child loss community during times of family-related stress or sadness. There's something about knowing that an entire community of women, men and families exists out there who've shared (and in many cases have gone through so much worse!) our experience with infertility

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-59163926649043995152011-03-02T11:03:00.000-05:002011-03-02T11:03:21.781-05:00

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Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-45689982707320100322011-02-09T11:37:00.004-05:002011-02-09T11:45:39.558-05:00

One of the absolute best things about living where we now live is our proximity to my parents and to my sister and her kiddos. Tatum gets to see his CeCe and Gramps at least once a week, and often sees his cousins several times a week as well. We are SO LUCKY, and while I know it may not last forever, we’re soaking up every minute of this time together. My sister invited us to their house for the

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-69791181744271404342011-01-23T16:47:00.003-05:002011-01-23T16:48:15.769-05:00

I knew there was a chance that this would happen someday. A family friend is pregnant with triplets. This girl’s mom (we’ll call her Julie) called my mom recently—they’re very close friends—to let her know before she found out elsewhere. Mom told me last night. And now, I’m confronted with some ugly feelings (the ugly is all me, by the way!  Not Julie or her situation). Ugh. I don’t know how I’m

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-33364686570061444672011-01-10T09:34:00.001-05:002011-01-10T11:53:13.045-05:00

There aren’t that many birthdays to which we tend to attach special meaning—sweet sixteen, perhaps 21 (drinks, anyone?), 30, 40, etc.  And the first.  It seems like the first birthday is imbued with added meaning in any family, but I think particularly when someone has struggled to conceive or has experienced the death of a child—there’s an added sweetness in that first birthday celebration. When

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-16845362745038946122010-11-18T12:31:00.001-05:002010-11-18T12:36:03.898-05:00

Some friends become pregnant at the drop of a hat.  They seem to *think* about pregnancy, and violá!  Pregnant they become.  Other friends have multiple miscarriages while trying to conceive their first child, their second child, their third…  Some friends have uneventful, easy, blissful pregnancies. Some friends have high-risk pregnancies that require constant monitoring and attention and induce

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-19284049643424081282010-10-13T14:15:00.001-04:002010-10-13T14:16:06.738-04:00

None of my jeans fit anymore, and that’s a good thing. Nine months of breastfeeding the kiddo, watching my food choices, and finally getting back to the gym over the past few months has accomplished a SEVENTY POUND drop in my weight since January. Yup. Seventy pounds. I gained a *bit* too much over the past few years of pregnancy and child loss and pregnancy again. Gets me thinking about gains

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-73019226454709111252010-09-27T12:14:00.002-04:002010-09-27T12:15:26.687-04:00

I thought about the boys all weekend. On Friday I was pretty darned ill—a migraine headache so severe that I nearly threw up. I thought it might be my body’s way of recognizing the impending anniversary of Adam, Joey and Paul’s “dirth.” (See Monica’s blog for some entertaining phrases—“dirth,” for instance, which encompasses both the birth and death of a child. M’s blog is exceptional if you like

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-16216260013691563442010-08-03T09:22:00.002-04:002010-08-03T14:07:13.440-04:00

I'm going to cross-post here and on Tate's blog because I just can't stand how quiet it is over here lately!  Last week we headed to North Carolina for a week at the beach with my dad, my sister and her husband, and their three children.  This was the longest trip we've taken away from home with the Tater, and it went far better than I'd anticipated. Things were a *bit* chaotic in the

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-9165160292880706552010-06-17T10:13:00.001-04:002010-06-17T10:13:26.417-04:00

Steve Job’s recent comment about our “...descen[t] into a nation of bloggers,” regarding how “we need editorial now more than ever” got me thinking about this space. I understand what he’s saying in the journalistic aspect—I certainly don’t want to see the death of print media. I love my Newsweek, my Washington Post, and (by the way) my livelihood sort of depends on print publications! I also

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-82011495519922994662010-05-09T20:29:00.002-04:002010-05-09T20:29:19.986-04:00

I won’t say “Happy Mother’s Day,” because I know how hard this day can be. Last year’s Mother’s Day was 8 months after we lost our three sons, and while the pain wasn’t brand new, it was still there and I did all that I could to ignore the greetings, the carnations handed out to moms at church, the smiling mothers and children around me. My heart was dark and bruised and broken, and I know that

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-55691220797292432172010-04-19T11:20:00.002-04:002010-04-19T12:39:22.232-04:00

Goodness but The Real Bean has been quiet lately. All of the action is over on TateSpace! Which, I’m learning, is a potential hazard of motherhood. You can all too easily lose yourself in the best roll of a lifetime—playing the part of Mommy, my gosh, how many of us have waited way too many years for a chance to take the stage in this most coveted of primo rolls??? If life were a play, this

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-6525650320187549662010-04-01T12:49:00.000-04:002010-04-01T12:49:12.480-04:00

I stink at taking self-portraits, but several friends have asked about my short hair so here goes. I now have mom hair.  It was simply taking too long to wash and dry my long hair knowing that a little boy was waiting (and possibly wailing!) for me to finish, so I hit the salon a few weeks ago and lost about 10 inches of hair!  Woah.  The transformation is complete. If I didn't feel like a mom

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-29982159010590893162010-03-04T11:24:00.001-05:002010-03-05T12:29:56.576-05:00

I’ve decided to create a second virtual space for Tatum after all. I may continue to blog about him occasionally here, but this space feels more and more like it belongs to our story—the story of Bruce and me, our travels, our dogs, our life. Much of this writing since 2005-2006 has focused on infertility, IUIs and IVF, our triplet pregnancy and it’s sad end in the too-early birth of our three

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-12730118540807840442010-02-25T14:45:00.008-05:002010-02-25T15:17:59.136-05:00

Thanks for the e-mails checking in! I know I’m getting a little redundant with the apologies for length of time between posts. The little guy is pretty demanding, and particularly when Bruce travels and I’m on my own, I’m not able to get on the computer as frequently. Not that I’m complaining! But I do feel some guilt about the infrequent updates, so I’ll try to do better.Tatum is amazing.

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-6109814069750881132010-02-11T11:46:00.001-05:002010-02-11T11:48:36.310-05:00

I should have used a question mark at the end of the previous post’s title: End of the Story? I didn’t intend to suggest that our blog will end here, just to express some of my concerns over how to best move forward. I guess the issue is, I’ve never separated my writing into different categories—one blog to contain my grief, another to showcase our happiness—though I understand that the people

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-42313602303360164902010-02-10T15:49:00.003-05:002010-02-10T16:03:58.476-05:00

I keep telling Bruce that I need to update my blog, but it doesn’t happen. In part I chalk the less frequent postings up to being a mommy to Tatum—his needs take obvious precedence over anything else, including my own desire to eat or sleep or take a shower, much less sit down at the computer for the time it takes to bang out a blog entry. But there’s something else going on, too. I can’t help

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-24392461394411416292010-02-04T13:46:00.002-05:002010-02-04T14:36:12.935-05:00

Sorry to have been so quiet over here, folks! My time seems to be parceled into chunks just small enough that I can’t seem to wrap my head around an actual update with thoughtfulness and meaning. Instead, I race around the house quickly throwing in a load of laundry, doing a quick blitz straightening of the bedroom or den, running the dishwasher, answering an e-mail message, finally returning a

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-11499631913889241352010-01-22T15:34:00.002-05:002010-01-22T15:41:29.094-05:00

I hardly know where to begin. Our world has changed since Sunday, January 10—things are beautifully, undeniably, joyfully, exhaustingly, achingly, exponentially different than they were a week and a half ago. Tatum is an amazing gift. I marvel over his features, his sounds, his small potato body and wrinkled brow and facial expressions that make me laugh out loud. As I’m marveling, I can’t

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-31553193251978729942010-01-13T14:13:00.004-05:002010-01-22T17:29:25.495-05:00

Hi friends—I wanted to quickly share some photos and updates with those who’ve followed our journey to Tatum. I’ll come back and write the full story here once I have the attention span for it. But briefly, Tatum was born on Sunday—my sister’s birthday (Jan. 10) at 10:53 PM in a surprise twist—no induction needed! He’s 21 inches, 7 lbs 8 ounces, with HUGE hands and feet and too-skinny legs. I’

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com37tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-83519667660409930092010-01-07T18:08:00.003-05:002010-01-07T18:34:13.887-05:00

I’m going to squeeze out one last entry BT (Before Tatum)! We wrapped up the nursery recently and I took some photos. Please be warned, if you’d prefer NOT to see photos of actual nursery art (and I totally get that!) these are those. I recently splurged on framing some pieces I’ve been saving up over the years. I purchased the first of these about five years ago. We were living in Germany

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com21tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-71268791302581330682010-01-06T22:18:00.001-05:002010-01-06T22:20:37.271-05:00

To quote one of Jim Mora's famous rants, “Playoffs? Don’t talk about playoffs.” (You probably need to be a football fan or at least shacking up with one to appreciate that reference. Or actually, anyone who’s seen one of those annoying Coors Light commercials…) Why would an ordinarily football-obsessed household such as mine blow off the playoffs this Sunday, you might ask? Why, because we’re

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-71878970637763508182010-01-05T10:49:00.003-05:002010-01-05T13:43:56.299-05:00

Bruce wants to send out an e-mail to friends and family when Tatum arrives, and asked if I could share a distribution list with him of folks I’d like to be included. I started compiling the list this morning and did a search in one of my e-mail accounts looking for a few family members’ addresses that I don't use all that often. What came up was this message:Dear friends and family, Thank you for

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-68938812251032370642010-01-04T12:39:00.002-05:002010-01-04T12:51:43.230-05:00

Our growth scan this morning showed the little man measuring at 39 weeks in the tummy, 38 weeks in the head, and 37 weeks in height. Estimated weight: 7 lbs 14 ounces. Our doctor's office was crazed this morning—every pregnant woman in Akron was apparently scheduled for an ultrasound or amnio, then our doctor was called away for an emergency (c-section? delivery?) and we were asked to make a

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-88997697209258129152009-12-29T12:54:00.002-05:002009-12-29T13:04:05.011-05:00

In a postscript to yesterday's note...Bruce already has his tattoo! I can’t believe how quickly he moved on this. He took a rough idea in over the weekend for the tattoo artist to look at, the guy came up with some ideas and Bruce left at 6 PM last night to get worked on. He made it home around 11:30 PM. I was already tucked into bed while my dad watched the last of the Chicago/Minneapolis

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-62551372631829900092009-12-28T12:31:00.006-05:002009-12-28T13:14:16.824-05:00

Typically I’m more into the giving than the receiving of gifts—I love picking out the present that I think is going to make someone’s face light up, and I did a pretty good job with the gifting this year! (More on that to come….) I have to say, however, that my husband out-did me this Christmas. He spoiled me rotten. And while the iPhone will be fun and I’m sure I’ll enjoy it, and I can’t wait

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-54486857607436559102009-12-18T14:05:00.007-05:002009-12-19T16:53:22.855-05:00

Behold…we have a nursery! Nothing on the walls yet, but the broad strokes are certainly in place. Crib: check. Changing table: check. Dresser: check. Clothing (lots and lots of it, thanks to our generous family and friends!): check. My stepdad came over this morning and replaced the pastel flower ceiling fan that was in there from the previous homeowners with the brown ceiling fan Bruce and

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-15187903122402392242009-12-14T12:54:00.002-05:002009-12-14T12:58:13.271-05:00

1) First of all, I really need to put up a holiday sketch to replace the Fall leaf over there. My sketching output has become pretty pathetic—from daily, to weekly, to now, apparently, seasonal! 2) The memorial ceremony last week was beautiful. I saw some friends I hadn’t seen in quite a while, and hearing Adam, Joseph and Paul’s names read out followed by the ringing of the bells was just as

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-45718256618843945162009-12-07T04:31:00.007-05:002009-12-07T21:35:59.416-05:00

There are so many things I’m looking forward to this holiday season that were beyond my ability to even consider last year. This year, Bruce lugged box after box of decorations up from the basement and we listened to carols (oh yeah—we went all out! And don’t let me to forget to tell you about our new favorite carol at some point during this post) while decking the halls and trimming the tree.

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-71937077055920624852009-11-30T11:40:00.003-05:002009-11-30T11:47:08.097-05:00

L.D. (first of all, let me backtrack momentarily to address L.D.’s nickname, which stands for “little dude”—at Thanksgiving, I referred to the kiddo as “L.D.” and my brother-in-law started laughing, saying “You named your kid after LARRY DAVID?” Then my sister chimed in with, “actually, I was thinking of “learning disabled.” So apparently I’ve consigned this child to yet another unfortunate

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-22956644752489661322009-11-24T10:08:00.002-05:002009-11-24T10:19:32.201-05:00

Bruce—my husband, for those who aren’t here regularly…I don’t cleverly disguise his name. Or my own. Nothing much clever going on here, really—at any rate, Bruce—sometimes known as “The Bruce” when he’s in rare form—recently became a home brewer. About six or seven months ago, he won a gift certificate at a golf tournament to the “Brew Kettle,” a local place where groups can get together to brew

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-84788448638343738982009-11-23T11:29:00.006-05:002009-11-23T11:38:46.555-05:00

I shouldn’t be prejudiced against my home town. It’s a sweet, good-hearted place in middle America with excellent schools, an impressive library (at which my mom works), a re-energizing downtown area complete with a gazebo smack dab in the middle (think Gilmore Girls, if you’ve ever watched that show), quite a few quaint shops and restaurants, and an extremely family-friendly atmosphere. Our

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-970622114100387612009-11-17T10:23:00.004-05:002009-11-17T10:29:22.398-05:00

It’s been a quiet few weeks over here. No major issues—shocking, I know! The gestational diabetes (GD) is so far cooperating well with my revised diet. As is my weight, woo hoo! It’s been unchanged for six weeks (actually, I LOST about a pound at my last appointment), and given that I gained too much early on I’m definitely NOT complaining—nor is my doctor. I’ve had a few fasting blood

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-11771484882707968342009-11-12T15:12:00.005-05:002009-11-15T19:49:57.840-05:00

I’ve been putting off dealing with this whole registry issue for a while now. You all know my feelings on the baby shower (maybe a “meet the baby” party down the road, but nothing beforehand)—so the need for a registry has fortunately been limited.BUT…I knew that a registry existed. Floating out there in the wild world of the Web, there existed a registry with that darned baby megastore (the

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-52323783053497038512009-11-09T09:01:00.005-05:002009-11-09T16:44:44.364-05:00

We finally, FINALLY are sneaking up on that 28-week marker tomorrow. Everyone who told me the weeks between 24 and 28 go slowly, you were soooooo right! They crawled. Meandered. Inched. Shuffled. Lollygagged their way along until this week…when L.D. turns 28 (weeks, that is)! THANK GOODNESS. I can breathe a bit more easily now. It’s amazing what a difference 7 to 8 weeks can make in the life

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-76894571083164962682009-11-02T14:33:00.004-05:002009-11-02T14:53:48.087-05:00

(Though really, if that were one of those word puzzles I loved when I was a kid, the answer would be Ohio in Halloween, not Halloween in Ohio...which I guess would look something like this: OH-Halloween-IO)I’ve had some requests for belly pics lately, and folks…this is as close as you’re going to get. Whereas I proudly showed off the tum during the triplet pregnancy because it was just SO

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-87681865152045402662009-10-30T12:43:00.002-04:002009-10-30T15:01:48.608-04:00

Speaking of passing grades (ala my last post)…I bombed the 3-hour glucose test. Well, maybe BOMBED is a bit strong. I didn’t pass with flying colors, let’s put it that way. My blood sugars apparently weren’t off-the-charts, but they were high enough that on Monday, I’ll be receiving my VERY OWN blood meter and test strips from my doctor. I’m sure I’ll get more details then, but I’m guessing

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-24348070845237522882009-10-26T11:48:00.001-04:002009-10-26T11:50:18.457-04:00

I’ve been counting down the days since this pregnancy began, eagerly awaiting our entry into the double-digits span of time. Today we made it! 99 days to go. Nena’s 99 Luftballons is on a continuous celebratory loop through my head. We have two weeks to go until we hit 28 weeks. Two weeks ago, we made it to that precious marker of viability, 24 weeks. But as I wrote then, 24 weeks only

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-64871554233836510032009-10-21T09:18:00.002-04:002009-10-21T09:22:22.968-04:00

A week has passed since last I wrote about waltzing that wall of viability. We’re still balanced (as balanced as I ever am, at any rate)—still walking that line! 25 weeks and counting. Not that anyone’s counting, right?! The days, the minutes, the hours…. I’m feeling L.D. moving around quite a bit these days, which is unbelievably cool. I felt the boys move a little from weeks 18 to 20, but

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-89680027840601830432009-10-13T15:26:00.001-04:002009-10-13T15:28:12.670-04:00

There’s a snaking, towering wall that runs down the middle of my life. I imagine it looks like the Great Wall of China when viewed from one of those distant satellite cameras up above. It’s a narrow wall, one that I walk each day—trying to keep one foot in front of the other, trying my best not to teeter and fall. On one side, I look down and see my life shaded by our struggles with

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-86132589498874747422009-10-10T18:41:00.003-04:002009-10-10T18:48:16.836-04:00

It doesn’t look much like a quaint English Inn on an island. It looks suspiciously like our living room. Our bag was packed. Our dog walker on call. Computers shut down and the house prepped for us to be out of town for the weekend. There was just that one last thing I needed to do…then SWOOSH. THUMP.Wouldn’t you just know it?! I was hurrying across the kitchen to do something or other (who

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-3379619491534233472009-10-07T15:12:00.002-04:002009-10-07T15:15:26.811-04:00

As we approach our 24th week of pregnancy, we’re beginning to believe—in a hazy, hopeful kind of way—that we might be bringing home a baby in late January or early February, depending on L.D.’s busy schedule. This burgeoning belief led us to pick up that often-mentioned guide to baby shopping known as Baby Bargains. It still seems like pure fantasy to me that I own this book. But I indulge

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-80295107123971859732009-10-05T14:43:00.005-04:002009-10-06T08:58:49.768-04:00

Yesterday, the kid who lives across the street—an adorable 4-year-old built like a tank with a husky little voice—came over to visit. He asked if he could see inside our garage. I said there wasn't much in there, just two cars and a bunch of junk—no toys or anything exciting like that. He rumbled, "I know, I just want to see in there." I asked him what he wanted to see, and he said "I just

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-53753529595266736412009-09-24T18:59:00.002-04:002009-09-24T19:28:23.137-04:00

From left to right: Adam, Joseph and Paul. This sketch doesn’t do them justice. I wanted to spend more time on it, but it was harder to tackle this project than I’d anticipated. I kept putting it off, waiting until the right time, waiting for inspiration. Finally tonight I realized that if I wanted a sketch for their birthday, I had to go ahead and give it a try. Staring at their features,

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-84404996079630329592009-09-23T08:23:00.003-04:002009-09-23T08:41:13.257-04:00

A very smart, funny, educated woman I know is writing a book on friendship. She recently sent me a message asking if I might want to contribute a few insights into how a friend should or shouldn't provide support to another friend when that person is grieving.I remember seeing a thoughtful list on someone's blog that was so well-written that I thought at the time, "I should save that!" But of

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-39817670196220235792009-09-21T13:01:00.006-04:002009-09-21T13:13:10.317-04:00

The little dude’s big ultrasound this morning was grand! Four chambers of a beating heart: check. Brain with everything appearing in the right place and no extra fluid: check. Spinal cord without holes: check. Little round peanut of a stomach: check. Nose and upper lip looking just dandy: check. Two arms and two legs: check. Ten fingers and ten toes: (honestly, I can’t tell from the photos but I

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-70982883692278891432009-09-16T13:07:00.001-04:002009-09-16T13:10:59.108-04:00

Today we are 20 weeks and 1 day pregnant with our “rainbow baby” boy. Almost one year ago, I was giving birth to our three sons at 20 weeks and 1 day into our pregnancy with them. I kind of knew today would be hard. Frankly, the whole month of September is a bit of a blight given the memories it carries from last year. Part of me didn’t believe we’d make it this far, but here we are! The Bean

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-30912926121515874012009-09-14T14:37:00.006-04:002009-09-14T15:21:26.567-04:00

First of all, the P17 shot on Friday was totally easy peasy! All of the prep work Bruce and I did with the progesterone in oil (PIO) shots must have paved the way nicely, because I barely flinched when the nurse gave me the shot last week. They’re actually sending another nurse to our hotel here in Colorado on Friday so that I stay on schedule with the shots—talk about service! The flight out

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-18912806225902395802009-09-10T09:09:00.000-04:002009-09-10T09:10:39.999-04:00

Tomorrow our P17 shots commence. My bum has enjoyed the break from PIO shots for the past month or so, but alas, the respite is coming to an end. At least the P17 shots are once a week rather than daily! A nurse is coming to our home on Friday to administer the first shot—joy. The thought of a stranger seeing my ever-expanding, dimpled dumpling of a tush weekly is mortifying. But apparently

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-46205272352515487402009-09-08T11:27:00.006-04:002009-09-08T18:30:50.156-04:00

You may recall from last week’s distressed post that we weren't supposed to have an ultrasound at today’s appointment. But then…I cried.It wasn’t some grand plot to work our way into the hearts of our nurses and convince them to squeeze us in—though Bruce and I HAD been trading ideas all weekend for ways we might convince our doctor to allow us a quick look. As she settled me onto the table and

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-3659871352557630122009-09-03T11:52:00.001-04:002009-09-03T11:55:14.607-04:00

The good news …1) My sister is having her third child today! She has an adorable 4-year-old boy and a scrumptious 16-month-old little girl. This baby is expected to be another girl. I’m so proud of my sister—she’s truly a wonderful mommy, patient and fun and loving and kind. Admittedly, I’m jealous. She’s my younger sister, and somehow I thought we’d be a little more even in terms of how many

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-47357040966523842462009-08-27T09:07:00.005-04:002009-08-27T12:08:18.766-04:00

(I'm late to Show & Tell, but decided to sneak this post in anyway...) Bruce and I didn’t take a real vacation this summer. Between the cost of IVF and the uncertainty the early days of this pregnancy generated, it just hasn’t been practical for us to take off to somewhere warm and beachy. To combat our vacation-deprived state, on Saturday we decided to take a day-trip. We called our dog walker

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-21597703185606330872009-08-24T12:07:00.003-04:002009-08-24T14:21:17.946-04:00

Nothin’ but a 5 centimeter cervix! That’s the amazing news. (For comparison, at this point during our pregnancy with the boys my cervix was LESS THAN ONE centimeter). Plus, and I’m cleared to travel to Colorado with Bruce next month! AND I’m released from pelvic rest. Bow chica row row. Good news abounds.Today’s appointment was not exactly what I expected, though. I’ll be the first to admit

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-46647073189496606602009-08-20T16:16:00.006-04:002009-08-21T08:38:49.711-04:00

I’ve been slacking so completely with my blog. I’ve started a few posts—several in preparation for the anniversary of the day Adam, Joey and Paul were born, coming up on September 25. I haven’t finished any of them yet. That’s the story of my life these days—projects half-started, intentions not quite fulfilled, stories half-written. I’m guessing those who’ve made it through the loss of a baby

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-24559213939280153472009-08-11T09:21:00.007-04:002009-08-11T11:29:44.788-04:00

Our appointment with Dr. S yesterday went well. Baby Bean is still measuring ahead of schedule at 16 weeks 2 days (wow!)* so the sub chorionic hematoma (SCH) doesn't seem to be impacting his or her growth at all. I'm always SO relieved to see that. We didn't get much more info. on the bleeding, other than a reiteration of the thinking that the chunk of stuff was probably a piece of the placenta

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-36665582561896996292009-08-09T12:01:00.013-04:002009-08-10T18:09:40.107-04:00

[Warning: not only is this post obnoxiously long, it’s also a little graphic. If you don’t like blood or jellyfish, and particularly don’t care for the idea of the two combined, I’d say skip this one.]I’ve been looking forward to this weekend’s wedding all summer. One of my best friends from junior high and high school, S, was married last night. Funny, though, her rehearsal dinner looked a

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-33937356750507309582009-08-03T14:00:00.002-04:002009-08-03T14:03:37.715-04:00

We received the results of Bean’s nuchal translucency scan today—all looks great. Better yet, the bean is measuring well ahead of schedule! His or her gestational age, by measurement, is now 15 weeks, though according to the calendar we’re 14 weeks along as of tomorrow. Looks like the Bean takes after his or her big brothers, who always measured at least a week ahead of schedule. This news is

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-65781781092210065502009-07-30T10:57:00.004-04:002009-07-30T11:35:40.387-04:00

I’m recycling the phrase “wenvy” from a discussion that took place on Monica’s blog a while back asking folks to come up with a word describing how they feel when they see pregnant women or interact with a baby. My word at the time was “wenvy,” a combination of wistfulness and envy. I don’t know if anyone’s seen the Raymond James commercial. The one that starts out with something like “How

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-74153675817747255492009-07-20T13:21:00.008-04:002009-07-22T12:49:53.005-04:00

When I typed that, Aerosmith’s song “Dude, dude, dude looks like a laaaaadie” went through my head. Now I’m singing, “Bean, bean, bean looks like a baaaaaaaaaby.” We’ve hit 12 weeks, folks! This morning we saw Dr. S, our maternal fetal medicine specialist. We got a great picture of the bean:In the “file under amazing” news category, my cervix is a long, strong 5 centimeters! Dr. S said he’s

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-55000218043314557362009-07-15T09:22:00.006-04:002009-07-15T09:45:12.450-04:00

This morning’s dose was officially my second-to-last PIO shot! My tush is such a lumpy, bumpy topography of bruised and sore skin that I’m not sure Bruce OR I could take it much longer. THANK GOODNESS! It’s gotten to the point where I can feel each cheek when I’m walking the dogs (step: ouch, step: ouch, step: ouch). We tallied it up last night, and tomorrow’s final shot will be number 65.

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-49657852357373350062009-07-09T05:01:00.006-04:002009-07-09T10:31:38.918-04:00

I’m surprised by the ways in which being pregnant with one is similar (at least thus far) to being pregnant with three. I’m tired. My bed calls to me in the middle of the day in a way that it never does when I’m not pregnant. I’m not much of a napper, ordinarily, but these days I can take an afternoon nap very easily. Bruce says I slept a lot more when I was pregnant with the boys, but it feels

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-63433542729946673672009-07-02T11:00:00.013-04:002009-07-02T11:48:00.220-04:00

I don’t post pics of two of the most important creatures in my life nearly as often as I used to. When we first adopted Sierra as a wee snodgling of a mutt, I took photos of her obsessively. It’s probably embarrassing to admit how many photo albums I have of Sierra has a puppy, in her awkward teenage years, and now as a prime-time adult (an adult who, indeed, is beginning to go gray on her

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-30098921428143989242009-07-01T08:37:00.005-04:002009-07-02T03:18:35.862-04:00

We saw our doctor yesterday and the bean looks good. Measuring exactly on target at 9 weeks, our 'Banzo Bean is a full inch tall now. Unfortunately that large dark area to the right side of the bean, the one shaped a bit like a mitten? That's the subchorionic hematoma. Obviously still there, and still large. So it looks like I'd better just sit back and relax and adjust myself to the notion

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-62033883632623885252009-06-26T17:16:00.001-04:002009-06-26T17:27:46.637-04:00

I can’t seem to write an interesting blog update anymore folks. I’m sorry—maybe you should all tune out for a while and then tune in again in a couple of weeks, when hopefully the subject has moved on from bleeding, bleeding and more bleeding.The thing is, how’s a person supposed to concentrate on anything else when they’re trying so hard to stay upbeat and positive about a pregnancy yet

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-21221796311778902092009-06-25T08:20:00.006-04:002009-06-25T08:51:58.729-04:00

We went to the doc's again yesterday. We had an appointment scheduled for Friday, but on Tuesday night I started bleeding quite a bit and by Wednesday I was in such a funk that Bruce suggested we just move the appointment up a day or two. Which our doctor's office did, they've been so nice and understanding about our tendency to get super-nervous about all of this. We saw our usual doctor

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-77981857105927796452009-06-22T19:29:00.001-04:002009-06-22T19:30:40.463-04:00

A HUGE thanks from the bottom of my heart to everyone who took the time to send me your positive thoughts and stories about heavy bleeding during pregnancy. It gave me such relief to read about pregnancies with placenta issues that went full-term and resulted in a live baby. Unfortunately my experience with pregnancy so far hasn’t shown me that things can go wrong and the baby (or babies) can be

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-43627899502616338122009-06-20T07:49:00.003-04:002009-06-20T08:01:44.272-04:00

Thank you all so much for your comments and support yesterday. I was on an Internet hiatus because I knew if I got on my computer, I'd start Googling "split placenta" and "divided placenta" and most likely accomplish nothing more than scaring myself thoroughly—so I took a little break. It was lovely to log on this morning and to see your messages, however! I feel such support and love from you

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-64953817812939439402009-06-19T14:04:00.002-04:002009-06-19T14:10:12.629-04:00

Have you ever had one of those days when the weather seems choreographed to your life? As if you were in a movie and the director was choosing to correlate nature’s offerings to the emotions of his protagonist? For me, that was today.This morning I lay in bed listening to ominous thunder storms and the downpour of relentless rain after a night spent filling toilet bowl after toilet bowl with

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-54405011033485459662009-06-16T10:14:00.006-04:002009-06-16T10:22:55.699-04:00

Apparently my plan is to celebrate my birthday by sending myself into pre-diabetic insulin shock! Oy. My teeth hurt. I woke up this morning craving a Chai Latte, and asked Bruce if we could trundle downtown to the café (a cute little coffee shop that recently opened up on the corner in downtown W.—a coffee shop! Here! And it’s really cute and I hope it gets a ton of business and stays afloat!

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-53077956844231716442009-06-12T11:04:00.007-04:002009-06-12T22:06:56.313-04:00

... our Garbanzo Bean! (In my head he or she has already become "Banzo Bean" for short.)We have ONE HEALTHY HEART BEAT. This gives me so much hope! Hope for an easy pregnancy. Hope for fewer complications. Hope that we'll have a son or daughter to take home with us in early February 2010. Oddly enough, riding on this wave of hope and joy, I can't stop crying. I'm overwhelmed by this, and I'm

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-42328923248003041102009-06-09T17:28:00.002-04:002009-06-09T17:44:08.732-04:00

Here it is! My first “by suggestion” sketch. These are my favorite slip-them-on-and-wear-them-with-anything-flip-flops. My uncle worked for a very popular sandal company that begins with “R” and ends with “eefs” for quite a few years. They make a TON of cool shoes, and between Bruce and I we own many, many pairs of R.eefs sandals. Sandals with bottle top openers in the bottom (Bruce), sandals

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-29526493916223466742009-06-08T08:39:00.001-04:002009-06-08T08:39:58.005-04:00

Friends, I need some help. My creativity seems to be majorly stalled (or lost underneath a slew of work deadlines and general exhaustion…pregnancy-related, I’m hopin’!) I need suggestions for my little sketches over there in the right-hand column. Those sketches that were once-a-day, then weekly, and now seem to be bi-weekly at best. I’m thinking I need to pick a weekly theme and then sketch

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-10589973027965418212009-06-04T09:17:00.005-04:002009-06-04T10:31:58.088-04:00

I’ve been thinking about my blog title. The Real Bean. I’m a little concerned that perhaps it sounds like a quest. When I first started writing in this space, I was referring only to myself. My childhood nickname, as those who’ve read the sidebar know, was Brenna Bean, Bean Bean, Beanie and Beaner. Back in 2004, my blog was like a second cousin or a distant aunt who I was fond of, but frankly

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-90948532225954838572009-05-31T16:09:00.006-04:002009-05-31T16:31:23.016-04:00

I haven’t participated in Show & Tell in a while, and thought this would fun to share. We took the pooches over to the grounds of Stan Hywet today, which is a beautiful home in Akron built by F.A. Seiberling, founder of The Goodyear Tire & Rubber Company. The country estate was constructed in 1912. The home itself is definitely worth visiting, but my favorite part of a Stan Hywet visit has

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-42022511117492131272009-05-29T11:43:00.005-04:002009-05-29T14:10:35.957-04:00

...and I got it. Today's beta: 547. That number makes me *just* a little nervous. I feel those butterflies beating around in my belly big time. My heart's racing just a bit—undeniably, I’m excited. But I'm also apprehensive. Getting ahead of myself. We'll find out more on June 12, which is the day of our first ultrasound. June 12 also happens to be my mom's birthday, closely followed by my

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-72066775112432421512009-05-28T21:36:00.005-04:002009-05-29T11:43:45.528-04:00

A good book can transport me like nothing else (not surprising, I'm the bookmobile ladie's daughter after all). Whereas some people sheepishly grin over their crushes on movie and TV stars, I’ve always harbored crushes on authors. Maybe it’s more than a crush—it’s a longing, an admiration so strong and complete that it makes me want to change myself, to become someone slightly different than

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-8011033502658822062009-05-27T13:43:00.006-04:002009-05-27T14:40:18.926-04:00

After the very slooooooow passage of time this morning (tick...tick...tick) we finally heard from our nurse with the beta update! It's very much what I was hoping for: not too high, not too low. Like Goldilock's porridge, it's juuuuuuust right. Ahhhh. At 9 days past our 5-day transfer (same as 14 days past ovulation, right?) my beta is 180.* I'll take that. :) Now it's on to Friday to see

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com25tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-44773135107926300272009-05-25T09:46:00.007-04:002009-05-25T10:02:00.881-04:00

I’m hopeful that this somewhat faint line will appear to be darker on tomorrow morning’s test:I’m hopeful that our beta on Wednesday confirms what I’ve been suspecting all weekend (and what this morning’s test seems to reveal). Sore and tender chest, stomach issues, weird twinges and cramping in the uterine area...all reasons to feel optimistic. I almost threw up after a lovely Thai dinner last

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-68003200223720956702009-05-21T13:06:00.004-04:002009-05-21T13:17:00.440-04:00

Bruce and I are taking off this afternoon for DC. First, he needs some face time with his colleagues, who haven’t seen him in person since the beginning of our IVF cycle over a month ago. He’s been itching to get down there for a while! Second, it’ll be a good way to hopefully burn the time between now and next Wednesday (next Wednesday, that being BETA DAY!!!!). I’ve made plans with friends

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-51813927825356299772009-05-19T17:00:00.003-04:002009-05-19T17:14:45.613-04:00

Okay, so I know I only gave you one day to vote. But I'm an impatient person, and I want to post individual pics of our two beautiful blasts on here! So here they are, the embies who were ushered into their hopefully cushy uterine environment yesterday:Blast #1 and Blast #6!Shalini nailed it. Granted the photo of Blast #1 is a bit confusing because of the bubble and also...I kind of accidentally

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-425228762086748072009-05-18T20:43:00.006-04:002009-05-19T09:38:57.167-04:00

Here they are IN PERSON, our super seven! Much cuter than my sketch made them out to be, no? You can't see their Superman capes in this photo, but I'm sure there are some teensy tiny capes in there somewhere. All are still growing and dividing, though one is looking a little stalled. With any luck, we may actually have a few more to freeze this time around!Two of these lovely blasts were

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-44612712866775887932009-05-16T12:17:00.005-04:002009-05-16T12:39:31.958-04:00

They grow! They divide! They’re at eight cells and counting…it’s the Super Seven, ladies and gentlemen!!! Yes indeed, all seven of our embryos were still dividing as of this morning, so rather than a day 3 transfer today we’re holding off for a transfer at 7 AM on Tuesday morning! Hopefully we have two beautiful blastocysts on Tuesday…but I’ll settle for one. I’m just so happy we’ve made it

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-89291159776803860342009-05-15T11:03:00.004-04:002009-05-16T12:40:38.763-04:00

I wanted to sketch something lucky this week. Other than Lucky Bamboo, though, we don’t really have any talismans in our house. I was casting my eyes around the den, trying to see if anything jumped out at me as the lucky item. I saw the Christmas cactus our friends Kevin and Stephanie sent to us in honor of our boys—the plant will bloom annually around December and January (it’s actually still

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-85298217820175832912009-05-14T14:42:00.003-04:002009-05-14T16:16:49.880-04:00

Our embryologist just called a few minutes ago to report that “all but one of our eggs are now embryos”! So 7 out of 8 fertilized and are dividing nicely! SWEET! Dr. K thinks we may do a blastocyst transfer on Tuesday rather than a day 3 transfer on Saturday, but he’ll call around 8 AM Saturday morning to confirm. We’ll either be transferring at 11 AM on Saturday or on Tuesday morning on day 6

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-67507454150567718292009-05-13T14:28:00.002-04:002009-05-13T14:29:29.199-04:00

Fortune teller! I got it exactly right. 8 eggs. We’ll find out tomorrow how they’re fertilizing and whether we’ll be doing a 3-day or a 5-day transfer. I’m sore and a bit tired, so I won’t stay online for long—but I wanted to post a quick update for anyone who’s curious.More from me tomorrow!—Madame Bean, Fortune Teller Extraordinaire

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-33910340544674340032009-05-11T10:17:00.004-04:002009-05-11T11:46:15.686-04:00

It's time to meet the Egglettes on the Eggy Show tonight!Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, welcome!After weeks of preparation, the gals have been prepped enough to release … rehearsal is over, it’s time for the show! We trigger tonight at 8:30 PM for retrieval bright and early on Wednesday morning. As in, up at the crack of dawn on Wednesday morning. So as you wake up and rub the sleep out of your

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-11460364156721155252009-05-10T11:56:00.001-04:002009-05-10T12:06:24.892-04:00

I have very little news to report, amigos. This morning’s appointment revealed 4 dominant follicles on each side, with a few smaller ones still playing catch-up. The big guys (gals) are hovering around 16-17mm each, so we’ll continue to stim at least one more day. Menopur tonight, Follistim and Ganorelix in the morning, and then back to the doctor’s office for another check-in. I’m hoping that

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8989700.post-87595734649573756962009-05-07T13:52:00.003-04:002009-05-08T10:36:31.165-04:00

We have two nests on our back deck right now. One is a robin’s nest. It’s a pretty impressive nest, built out of an array of twigs, leaves and some textile-looking swatches of fabric or cloth. The sides are tall and look very sturdy. It’s actually so tall that I can’t see inside the nest—in fact, I’m not sure a bird could squeeze in to sit on top of a family of eggs without constantly bumping

Brennahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04177178792621340014noreply@blogger.com9